Plumber Five

May/June 2013

G again. So I write a carefully crafted letter to the French plumber (who 'gets' pellet stoves), in impeccable French, which is obviously less impeccable than I'd like to think. The French plumber never replies.

The Yorkshire terrier continues to be determined that LPG heating is the solution. If we want a wood-based stove (and that includes a modern wood-pellet stove) he's convinced that we'll need a hot water 'buffer' tank the size of a small train. In our tiny barn? - where on earth would we put such a thing? He might be right on the economics of LPG if we only stay there for a few days each year, but we'd like to keep our options open. What if we want to move over to France hoping to spend great slabs of winter in the barn, writing definitive novels and composing bleak sonatas? Who'll pay for the wicked gas bills? I don't want my sonatas to be that bleak.

We put the terrier on the backburner and decide to explore our options with Plumber Number Five if one can be found. More research on an English website, and phonecalls with a delightful and endlessly patient soul at Ashgrove Stoves in England. On their website we unveil a possible saviour in the Dordogne nearby who might be able to help. I send him everything that might persuade him this is a project to get-out-of-bed for. Small but rewarding project, I say!

He says he can only start at the end of July. I think we might be able to get this to tie in with the main stonemasonry and concrete floor work. Then follows another three weeks of slow back-and-forth of questions and answers, trying to find the balance of seeming calm and in-control, and at the same time indicating that just a little bit of speed would be fantastic.